Last Friday night I was coming home from Nanaimo, and per usual the ferry was full with visitors trying to get an early start on their weekend. I was hanging out at the bow, trying to avoid noisy chatter, and somehow I overheard the expression 'we're just going to veg out'. I kind of smiled to myself and mused over the few bits of slang I knew, and before I could stop the train I found myself hooked on the talk. It's strange and amusing at the same time to hear this stuff and understand exactly what it means. You have to be careful with this lingo, and it's easy to start off on the wrong foot. (Now, how can that happen?) You can be pooped. A baby in diapers gets poopy, and if you don't know what you're doing you're probably a nincompoop! See what I mean? This stuff can get addictive, especially if you're in the corporate world where the smart talk is competitive. Take 'ramped up' as an example. This one took me a while to understand because it seems more like a phrase you'd use in the construction world. Right? This language catches me off guard at times, but now that I think of it I remember thinking I was pretty cool to say things were 'peachy'.

Maybe we talk this way because the norm can be sort of boring or ho hum. Notice how our conversation becomes more animated when we throw in a quirky phrase like 'he's on me like a dirty shirt'? Our antenna goes up, and either you're confused by it, or you understand exactly what that means. In that case you better direct that guy to the washing machine pronto, because no one likes a dirty shirt. Sometimes we use these phrases to soften a less than polite word in the presence of more delicate company. For instance 'Holy crow' is a good substitute for well .... something else. While we're at it, how does a mere crow get to be holy when I'm still working at it? Now, that's 'pushing the envelope'. However, there's no substitute for saying 'it's crap shoot', and the best thing to do is get the bleep out of the room!

Think before you talk. It's so easy to blow it by saying something misleading or inappropriate, and it can be practically impossible to save your bacon when that happens. When someone tells me they want to 'spill their guts' to me, I have to shudder. That's just nasty! How do you quickly retract your guts and carry on a heart to heart discussion? Hmmm, that's still too messy.

Argh*#*!! Listen to me! I never used to talk like this, and now I'm addicted to it and I can't stop. My mind is racing with more clever similes, and I'm feeling pretty damn ...like I'm flying by the seat of my pants and it's just so easy. Dog gone it! What do think of that Sarge?